I had a visit today from someone close who is having lots of problems with a member of her family. She was telling me about lots of bad things that have happened lately and how they have been affecting the family.
During this conversation we were thinking what could have happened to this family member to have so many problems and to be causing her family such concern. And we went over things that happened in the past that could have maybe contributed to this… but then I remembered ‘Positive talk’… so I said to my visitor in a kind way…”really, where is the point of going over the past?” “Why don’t we think of what we can do to help them with the future?”
This question triggered off another conversation which was of a better and calmer nature and was much more useful. The past is the past and we can learn from it but going over it is sometimes negative… concentrating and talking about the future can be far more positive.
Thanks so much for sharing this Geri. I can definitely learn from it (and have been learning!). We can’t change the past. But we can change how we think about a situation, and we can change our thinking so we have a *positive* attitude, which is so much more constructive.
Hiya Geri. It’s funny how such a simple change in focus can actually yield such different, and more positive experiences. And it really does make a useful difference! I wish all the best to your friend and her family x